Dating while fat and feminist
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In navigating a fatphobic, sizist culture, it's very difficult to find a partner that is worth committing to when the world codifies your body as unworthy of love. In finding a potential partner, my experiences have allowed me to create questions to guide me in knowing who to invest in as a queer Black fat femme. This post has not been vetted or endorsed by BuzzFeed's editorial staff. BuzzFeed Community is a place where anyone can create a post or quiz.
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Big Girls Need Love, Too: Dating While Fat (And Feminist)
Fat feminism - Wikipedia
Let me be clear: this is not a fat-hating post. When I look in the mirror, for the most part, I like what I see. But with brothers I find, that they, too, have internalized a particular relationship to the body-type most associated with the mammy figure. They usually find us comforting.
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Dating While Fat And Feminist, And The Nasty Things You Learn When You Lose Weight
To be honest, dating while fat, Black, queer, a hood feminist, and a radical activist means either compromising parts of myself, or suffering through easing partners into gradually respecting all of my humanity. Living in a culture that defines my body as unhealthy , a problem, ugly, unhygienic, and unworthy of love makes it that much harder to find a potential partner to value all of me. Through all of the trials and tribulations, and in circumnavigating my identity, there are five primary questions I consider before committing to a potential partner. This is the number one question for me, especially as a fat femme. In high school, I dated a guy who only asked me out to humiliate me in front of his friends.
How can we resolve our desires with the ways that, for example, women are often reduced to objects? How can men in particular express desire without worrying that they are objectifying someone? These are good questions without obvious answers.
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